Why I Hated Andor

Andor was Star Wars’ first real attempt at prestige TV. It wasn’t just fun for the kiddos. It was gritty and real and definitely for adults. Disney probably thinks it was a huge success. Everyone loved it (96% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes). The ratings were great. It won Emmys. But man, oh man, did I hate it.

For those who didn’t watch, Andor was a prequel series to the movie Rogue One. It followed Cassian Andor from his recruitment into the rebel cause right up to the events of the movie. Rogue One was just kind of meh. It suffered from some lazy writing and was too long. So, I didn’t have high hopes for Andor, but it failed to live up to those low expectations.

There were three big problems with Andor. The first was the plot. Or more accurately, the lack of plot. There was only about 90 minutes’ worth of story spread across 24 episodes. There was more filler than story. A lot more filler. Syril Karn was a waste of a character. His whole subplot was nothing more than a snipe hunt. Every scene with Saw Gerrera was plain insulting they were so pointless. I’d have rather had the writers come spit in my face than watch Saw huff rocket fuel. Even most of the scenes with Andor himself were filler. There were like three episodes of Cassian stealing a TIE Avenger ship that went nowhere. Same for his stint in prison. All we got out of that was a meme of Andy Serkis saying he can’t swim. If it had been a rather short movie, it might have been OK. There just wasn’t nearly enough plot to sustain 24 episodes of television.

The next big problem was the character Bix Caleen. She was supposedly a major character. She appeared in 17 of the 24 episodes. She was Andor’s love interest. And she didn’t do anything. Things were done to her. She was needlessly tortured. She was almost raped. She developed a drug addiction. Then, at the end, she ran away so Andor wouldn’t be tied down, and she gave birth to what was apparently Andor’s child. I want to stress that this was straight up bad writing. Adria Arjona did what she could with the role. There was just something extremely distasteful about a 2D female character whose only purpose was to suffer and give birth. I guess they thought they were raising the stakes or making the show even grittier or something, but it was really hard to watch.

The third big problem was that it didn’t feel at all like Star Wars. Without the first two big problems, this might not have been a problem. I’d like to think there’s enough room in the Star Wars universe for different types of shows, even gritty, realistic ones. But Andor didn’t give me a single hit of nostalgia. If I’m going to sit through 24ish hours of nothing happening and distasteful characterizations, I need some nostalgia to make it watchable. The Book of Boba Fett was objectively terrible. I mean it was really, really bad. But it was full of nostalgia and strangely watchable. Andor lacked the one thing that could have made it watchable.

There were also myriad little problems with the show. Luthen killing his compromised mole, most of Mon Mothma’s daughter’s wedding, and things like that. But if they had been in a decent show, they would have been forgivable. Instead, they just added to the total mess.

What it all comes down to is I hated Andor.