A Football Conundrum

When two unlikable teams are playing each other in the championship, how do you decide which to root for?  That’s the problem we’re facing with the 2018 NFL championship game.  It’s the Eagles against the Patriots, which means that nobody wins.  There was so much potential.  We were so close to the Jaguars playing the Vikings.  Then everyone would have won.  Alas, we’re stuck these two teams.

I know, the easy answer is to not watch the game.  It wouldn’t be the first time.  But I’ve watched more football this year than I have in ages.  I don’t know why exactly.  At the beginning of the season, I didn’t think I would watch while Colin Kaepernick was unemployed.  But, then Trump told me not to watch the NFL while there were players protesting and I changed my mind.  I’m still unhappy about Kaepernick, but at least I can support the players who are still protesting.  So, if I don’t watch the championship, the season will feel incomplete.  Also, the game is one of the few big cultural events that I partake in, so I feel bad when I miss it.

But we have these two teams.  The Patriots are just impossible to root for.  They are like football’s version of the Yankees.  They win all the time and they’re incredibly smug about it.  Their fans are insufferable.  Their owner is the worst.  And Tom Brady is the face of their franchise.  How can you root for a team led by a robot?  Especially a robot that appears to be so stupid.  A bag of flour has more personality.

The Eagles are a bit harder to pin down why they’re unlikable.  I think it mostly comes from their fans.  This is a group of people who throw batteries at people and famously booed Santa Claus.  I’ve never been to an Eagles game, but I’ve been to a Phillies game, and I believe all the stories.  It’s not just that they aren’t friendly.  They’re openly antagonistic towards fans of any other team.

Ultimately, it seems that the Eagles are the right answer to this question.  At least they’re underdogs.  When in doubt, always root for the underdogs, right?  That’s the best I can come up with.  Hopefully we can all forget about the game shortly after it’s over.

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