Someone brought a tray of Italian cookies to work today. It’s the holiday season and there’s been different kinds of food in the breakroom all week. It’s been kind of nice. Today it was Italian cookies. I didn’t have any. It wasn’t that I wasn’t quick enough. There were plenty there when I walked into the break room. It wasn’t that I was ungrateful. It was a very nice gesture. The problem was that Italian cookies are disgusting.
For a country whose savory cuisine is so good, it’s amazing how badly the Italians screw up dessert. The cookies seem stale from the second they leave the oven. The texture is just atrocious. And whoever first thought that licorice flavored cookies were a good idea was wrong. Licorice flavored anything is a bad idea.
Cannoli aren’t as bad as the cookies, but they’re always disappointing. They look like they should taste great. The ingredients list makes it seem like they should be good. But, at best, they’re meh. I’ll eat one if pressed, but it’s really not worth the effort of lifting it to my mouth.
Gelato is even worse. Who wants less creamy ice cream? And it’s way too dense. It’s not disgusting, but why would anyone choose it when real ice cream is freely available?
Tiramisu would be fine if not for the soggy lady fingers and the bitter espresso.
Granita is just a fancy slushy.
No one ever actually liked a fruitcake, right?
And Italian Ice? It’s the exception that proves the rule. I have to admit, it’s delicious.