Why Haven’t I Written about My Divorce More? Is It Because I’m a Man?

I write about all kinds of stuff on here. Some of it is silly. Some of it is serious but not about me. Some of it is speculative. And some of it is very personal. One thing I haven’t written about much is my divorce. When it first happened, I wrote two pieces, here and…

Read More

Sleepovers

My daughter is having her second sleepover of her winter break. A couple of days ago, she hosted. Tonight she’s staying at a friend’s. I don’t know how it is for other parents, but I find hosting a sleepover to be a lot of work. I feel a lot of pressure to make sure they…

Read More

Depressive Nostalgia

Depression has made me nostalgic, and not in a good way.  As far as I can remember, I’m not normally the nostalgic type.  The past is the past.  Some of it was fun, some of it wasn’t.  Either way, I don’t dwell on it.  Or I didn’t dwell on it.  Lately, I spend an awful…

Read More

Why Do I Do This?

I was recently asked about one of my posts about depression.  The question was basically asking how I felt about my post.  I answered that I didn’t think it was great.  It takes a lot of energy to write, even the short posts, and, as a result, I feel like many of my posts are…

Read More

A Paucity of Words – Loneliness

I’m lonely. I don’t know how much of it is depression, how much is the divorce and how much is actually being alone (although I rarely seem to be alone, so my guess is it’s the first two), but I suppose it doesn’t really matter. Whatever the cause, I am lonely. It feels different from other…

Read More

Guilt Without Sin

I don’t really believe in sin.  At least not in the literal sense of the word.  I do believe that rooting for the Yankees is a sin, as is putting more than one topping on a serving of ice cream.  But the idea of a crime against God or nature or the universe or whatever…

Read More

The Silence of Sounds

One of the oddest effects of depression is being unable to enjoy things that I know are enjoyable.  For me, that is most noticeable with music.  I am completely obsessed with music and have been ever since I can remember.  I have a huge record collection.  I go to shows whenever I can.  I play…

Read More

Something New and Horrifying

As I’ve said before, there’s a lot that has happened to me during my divorce that I wasn’t expecting.  The latest happened to me in the grocery store a few days ago.  I got in line to buy my stuff.  When I got up to the cashier, I became acutely aware that she was very…

Read More

What Am I Now? or What the Heck Is a Grass Widower?

I got divorced the other day.  I’m not normally one to label myself.  I’m just me.  But, I’ve been having some trouble with the whole situation, so I thought words might help.  They can help me tell my story and that can help me make sense of everything.  There’s a problem with this approach, though. …

Read More

I Am A Grass Widower

I got divorced this afternoon.  It was weird.  We went to the court house, signed some forms, waited for a while, then went before the judge.  We sat there while the judge read our agreement.  After that, we stood and swore to tell the truth.  Next, my Ex’s (that sounds weird) lawyer asked her a…

Read More